Unsuitable for Children

I had the craziest thing happen to me the other day! I have to warn you that some of the following material may be unsuitable for children. So if you’re anything like me, with at least two little monkeys crawling on you at all times, you may want to excuse the ones who know how to read now. You wouldn’t want them to repeat any of this disturbing story. Excuse the ones that can’t read too, because there’s no telling what reaction this tale may elicit from you.

So my husband and I were sitting at the food court at the mall the other day, just minding our own business and trying to enjoy our lunch. This woman walks over and sits at the table next to ours with her adorable baby in a stroller. I watched, smiling, as the young mother pulled the fat little creature out of his seat, placed him in the highchair next to her, and covered his adorable dinosaur t-shirt with a tiny blue bib. The entire time she set this up, she cooed, laughed and nibbled at his fingers. I sat there thinking, “What a wonderful mother.”

All good feelings vanished  when I saw what she did next. The horrible, shocking, disgusting thing that she did next. It all happened so fast that I hardly had time to process what was happening until it was too late. I can barely even type it here, except that I want you all to understand what revulsion I felt at the time.

This mother who I had thought so highly of only a moment before had the audacity to pull from her diaper bag a small jar of applesauce and a miniature baby spoon. I watched in slow motion horror as she slowly, almost sexily peeled the foil from the top of the food. I all but gasped out loud as she dipped the spoon seductively into the lumpy sauce and brought the spoon in the most carnal way to the child’s mouth. Over and over, I watched this sensual motion until I could stand it no longer. The definite clincher was when my husband, MY HUSBAND!, happened to see these goings on from the corner of his eye, and, out of curiosity, turned his face to actually SEE what this woman was doing in the most PUBLIC of PUBLIC places!

That was it. In outrage, I threw my napkin on the table and marched over to give her a piece of my mind. I said, “What do you think you’re doing?”

She gave me this doe-in-the-headlights look, like she couldn’t figure out what I was talking about. She said, “I’m feeding my baby.”

Just like that. Like it was no big deal! So I got really mad and told her, “You know, you may be just fine with YOUR husband seeing another woman using her spoon in public, but I most defiantly am not. Spoons are meant to be kept at home where you can feed your child applesauce to your heart’s content, not in public places where everyone can see you.

“If you MUST feed your child every two hours, you need to stay home to do so. If you MUST leave your house, you need to feed him before you leave and return home in time for the next feeding. But if you REALLY, REALLY MUST stay out in PUBLIC longer than two hours, you need to go to a private spot where he can eat without disturbing others. There is a lovely restroom down the hall where several toilets are available for your sitting pleasure!

“Furthermore, a few minutes ago, a group of children walked by and saw you spooning that applesauce into your child’s mouth. CHILDREN! How do we explain to them why you have your spoon waving carelessly about? Or where applesauce comes from? I think you’ve just robbed them of a piece of their innocence.”

I walked away then, dragging my husband behind me as quickly as possible- so quickly that the posters of woman in their bras, men in their underwear, and senior portraits of nearly nude seventeen year olds were all but a blur-  lest he be corrupted by this flaunting woman and her disgusting spoon. I feel as though justice was served that day, and I hope that woman learned her lesson. It is just not appropriate to feed a baby in public places.



About Anna Helfey

I am a stay-at-home mom of seven, and, despite what that implies, I seldom really know what I am doing. Don't tell my kids that, though. They're under the impression that I've got it under control.

642 responses to “Unsuitable for Children

  1. I took a flight with my then 3 month old, knowing I would have to nurse. I was so scared that people were going to be mean. When the flight attendant gave my husband an extra pillow for the baby’s head (without asking), and said thank you..I was touched and speechless.

  2. Sarah

    I love this!!! I NEVER fed my baby in a bathroom…I was discreet and respectful of others and didn’t ever flaunt my boobs to everyone and no one ever saw them (although it was difficult at times). I fed Jaxon at Dunkin Doughnuts, Dairy Queen, at an arena during a hockey game and so on. I even fed him in the camping section of Walmart in a lawn chair! LOL! I wouldn’t want to eat in a bathroom so why would I ever feed my baby in one? Also, Walmart is really good about opening a changing room if you want more privacy and just let it all hang out. 😉 I tried not to attract attention but it was hard when Jaxon was soooo loud! People could HEAR him sucking and literally saying, “Um, um, um, um” backing up his head and attacking my boob like he hadn’t eaten in days instead of just a couple of hours! LOLOL!! My husband was very supportive and he was very adament that I breast feed which I am very grateful for. It’s cheap, easy (after I got the hang of things) and very healthy for the baby…so why not do it? I loved not having stupid bottles to heat in the night or having to clean those dumb bottles and boil them hahahaha! I just find that people are so dumb about breast feeding. I mean, they don’t seem to notice skinny jeans-usually on people who should NEVER wear them-butt crack, half naked bodies walking around, Victoria Secret commercials and fashion shows, Jack Ass and those idiots being way too naked on prime time television, and vivid sex scenes in movies that their children watch but they freak out over boobs feeding babies! That’s just stupid. I can’t stand uneducated, irrational, ignorant people…this article shows just how dumb people are and how ridiculous their reactions are to a woman who is feeding her baby. 🙂 LOVE it!

  3. Katja

    I was not able to breast feed due to meds I take. I’ve never had an issue with another mom breast feeding nor have I deterred my children from knowing what breasts are created for. Both my kids are early elementary now and extremely curious. I tell them straight about things. I do love this though, because if anyone came up to me and crabbed at me about feeding my kid I’d be hard pressed NOT to knock them out.

  4. Jennifer

    I’m amazed and saddened by some responses to this great post. Kids are pretty great at accepting truths and moving on with it. My almost 6 year old doesn’t question why my 3.5 year needs milkies when she’s tired or hurt. He says he remembers them and thanks me because he loved me holding him so much. If we see other moms nursing the kids briefly notice because hey it’s another little person and just move on. I nursed my daughter once at a local restaurant and there was a table full of police officers next to us. Not one of them batted an eye. I was as covered as a hungry 3 month old would allow. Everyone was social and gave my eldest some high fives. My body is doing what it was designed to do. I’m very proud of that.

    • I find it odd to breast feed a 3.5 YEAR old when most docs suggest whole
      milk at onr yr. I breast fed until one. A child that can annunciate milkies can do without the boob.:)
      3 months and 3 years is a huge difference. I don’t think God intended us to milk our toddlers. That is my opinion, people usually react to posts like the one above as it isn’t normal to brest feed a child that old nor is it necessary.

      • Still Scared( but getting angry)

        Every where but America it is normal to breast feed past one. I did my oldest until he was two, right before the twins were born. I had to force wean the twins at 18months because I was pregnant and could n’t drink enough water it seemed, I kept getting UTI’s. My daughter nursed until 3. It is not good to start cow milk that early, the longer you can wait, less food allergies. Your facts are wrong.

      • Mom28gr8kids

        Heather, I have raised/am raising 8 children and have nursed them all from 6 mos. to 2.5 years. They are all different. Just because pediatricians recommend 12 mos. doesn’t mean that is what is best for them. Even the World Health Organization recommends closer to 4 years. Our selfish sexually obsessed society is robbing babies and mommies of precious, healthy years of nutrition and bonding. If you truly want to know what God thinks about it, read about the childhood of Moses. His mother was paid to nurse him and the Bible teaches that his mother taught him about his people before she weened him and took him back to the Pharoah’s daughter to be raised in the palace. Even my 3 year olds wouldn’t remember much teaching. He was probably much older before he was weened. I love hearing of mommies nursing longer and longer. When I first started out nursing 27 + years ago I had little to no support and only lasted 6 mos. My last 5, I was so much more confident and mature that I did what I knew was best and have never regretted nursing for 2+ years. Precious memories.

      • Judy

        There’s plenty of evidence that in times past, children were nursed well into toddler years; Maccabees mentions 3 years. In my experience older children tend to mainly nurse at night or when hurt/sick/injured, so it’s normally not an issue of being in public anyway.

      • Dana

        A proper study of breastmilk, brain physiology and development, social and emotional health and immunology would clearly change your mild about not breastfeeding beyond the age of 1. Breastfeeding is not primarily for the convenience or comfort of the parent, but because anything else has negative long term consequences for the present generation and generations to come (a study of epigenetics will confirm this for you). Please do your homework. Your child depends on you.

      • Channah

        Actually the American Pediatrics Assoc. recommends 2 yrs old now for breastfeeding. Giving cows milk increases the chance of allergies. The longer you breastfeed, the healthier your child, less sickness and other health issues. Coming from a mom who breastfed all 8 children, longest till day before his 4th birthday. Shalom.

      • luckymom

        Just so you know, people have breastfed for 2-4 years historically. In fact, the World Health Organization among other leading health organizations recommends that women breastfeed a minimum of two years. I used to think it was weird too until I became a mom and started doing my own research. Just because it’s unusual in our culture doesn’t mean that it’s wrong, in fact it’s very healthy.

      • I agree. Our culture is wrong, not the practice of extended breastfeeding.

      • becca

        Wow… Just wow… Have you even done a minute amount of research on how long “god” intended us to bf? Do you really think that “god” intended our kids to drink cows milk st 1yr? Or at all?. I promise you, god didn’t intend for us to drink cows milk. He actually intended for us to breast feed well into the toddler/preschool years. Also, most drs recommend breast milk until at least 2yrs. If youre Dr told you to stop breastfeeding at a year and you did so, because he told you to, you both are quacks.

      • Sarah

        Um. So in the bible at one year they started giving their kids cows milk in a sippy cup? You can do whatever you like, and so can other people, but the historical and biological norm has been to breastfeed toddlers…

      • kitteh

        Formula companies have begun to widely promote a specially-formulated toddler formula/milk that is high in DHA, which is essential for brain growth. The commercial assures us that the human brain grows most during the first 3 years of life, so providing toddlers with their formula give children a healthy start to life. Well, you know what else is naturally high in DHA? Breastmilk! I think that nature really DID intend for human mothers to continue giving breast milk to their human children beyond infancy. A child’s immune system doesn’t fully develop until they are well past a year old. Breastfeeding supplies the growing child with mama’s antibodies, it’s really amazing how perfectly suited our milk is for our toddlers and small children. Cow’s milk is meant for baby cows!

      • Kay

        Before you state your lame opinion, you should Educate yourself on breastfeeding toddlers. You think cows milk is better to give a one year one than human breast milk ? What is wrong with people? Extended breastfeeding is done for MANY reasons and is done all over the world. It’s crazy how something so natural is not acceptable in this world.

  5. courtney

    ok. this is enough. I have read so much about breast feeding in public, and frankly, i can’t hear anymore. NO ONE is upset, disgusted or mortified that someone is feeding their child. they are, however, slightly uncomfortable, when they unexpectedly see a breast. you want a society who reserves nudity for private, we tell women to leave something for the imagination, we criticize those who bare too much cleavage and then wonder why people are a little taken off guard when you whip out your breast like it’s no big deal. you can’t have it both ways. feed your child whenever you need to, breast feed away! but, please keep in mind the comfort of others as well, by not actually showing your breast while doing it. there are blankets, towels, and even shirts designed just to help you keep the girls under cover while you nourish your babe. i remember that i went to talk to a friend’s friend at a baby shoer and i was thrown off by seeing all of her breast and I honestly didn’t know if it was appropriate to carry on a conversation with her because, well, we are taught that boobs are private. not once did i think ‘oh gross she is breastfeeding,” i thought, ‘well, there’s her boob, wasn’t expecting that! maybe she need some privacy. where do it look? this is kinda awkward.” while we get that being a mother is tough and you are looking for convenience whenever possible and no one wants moms to have to excuse themselves for 30-40 minutes every two hours, please also consider those around you who have no problem with you breast feeding, but who definitely aren’t expecting or wanting to look at your boob. go for it, but at least give covering up a chance. also, for the record, i think breastfeeding is one of the best things you can do for your child and props to you all for sticking with it even though it’s hard. just keep the girls covered whenever possible, those things are precious for your, your baby and your man (or woman as the case may be).

    • melanie

      Courtney! I couldn’t have said it better myself!
      I remember going to my oms friends house when I was a kid and seeing her friend whip out her boob. I was uncomfortable. Couldn’t look her in the eye at all! I couldn’t leave because her friend was cutting my hair in the kitchen. I got that fluttery feeling in my stomach and just looked down the entire time. It stuck with me all these years.

      I think breastfeeding is wonderful. I gave my everything with breastfeeding all 3 of my kids. I was not as successful as other mothers but I gave it a try. I was always respectful of others in my surrounding. I agree if you have to feed your kid in a public place, a blanket or breastfeeding shirt is what should be used. you cannot expect to pull out your breast and have someone not stare or feel weird or uncomfortable!

      • lisa

        Oh for heavens sake it is a breast not genitalia you had to see! what in heavens name is wrong with people that they are reduced to being unable to have a normal conversation or get disturbed because someone gets a boob out to feed a baby? You see more boobs on the average beach!

        And while you are asking for respectful behaviour how about you also ask all mens mags and newspapers to cover the front pages in store, stop all provocotive billboards and shop fronts and tell every slapper wearing cleavage hanging out clothing and butt cheek hanging out shorts to cover up…what a joke.

        I cannot believe the prudish behaviour in this society. Go visit some of the Southern European countries where there is none of this stupidity about nursing a baby.

      • Karrie

        I would agree with lisa. Breast are made to feed our babies. We are no problem displaying bottles in public. A work with a culture that is very concerned with covering up, yet when I visit them and their baby is hungry they nurse them. It is natural and just because it make you feel uncomfortable we have invented hooter hiders. How silly. I applaud all women who have the confidence to breastfeeding in public. I was fortunate that no one approached me and ask me to feel else where. I also .had a very supportive family that welcome me to feed me babies in front of them. I hope we can just support women instead of judge them

    • The thing is that people are disgusted. Women are still being asked by restaurant waiters, flight attendants, etc. to breastfeed in the bathroom, no matter how discreet they are being. Mothers are covering themselves as much as they can without covering their babies–which would be an unreasonable request, as no one can eat very well with a towel in their face–and yet people are still displeased. In contrast, people are quite okay with women walking around with their boobs hanging out. Nobody is stopping them, and yet if the tiniest amount of cleavage is shown by a mother while she’s nursing, people get uncomfortable.

      • That is exactly it, we don’t see people going up to Victoria Secret runway shows and saying For goodness sake Cover those hooters before they take an eye out! But Heaven forbid seeing the non areola of a womens breast! Every day I see my 16 yr olds friends in shorts that I cant even look at and spaghetti strap shirts that show to many goodies! I get uncomfortable with that. Our priorities are screwed up plain and simple.

    • If boobs are private, then why is this country so hell bent on selling absolutely everything with sex? You see more boobs going to the beach than you will see running into a nursing mother in the mall.

    • Obviously you have never breastfed a child. Some baby’s don’t mind a cover but most babies do. It’s awkward, hot and annoying. Have you ever eaten under a cover? You should try it, pretty hard to breathe and eat all while covered. Babies are curious and want to see the world around them, when you cover it up they have a tendency to look around it. As for seeing a breast so you get a glimpse at a boob for goodness sake just look away. I don’t get how hard that is. No one is forcing you to look at a woman’s breast, just look away or in the situation with your friend look at her eyes when talking to her, you’re not having a conversation with her breast. In the end they are just boobs, boobs made of human flesh, they are not sinful or indecent just skin.

      • TS

        This post was great! I have to agree with Jennifer. No, not because I’m a man. Not because I’m a lesbian woman. Because I am a parent. Children deserve to be fed in WHATEVER way works best for THEM. Not in a way that is for any one else’s comfort, INCLUDING the mother’s or the random people around. If you’re offended by a breast, or by a nipple, or cleavage, or a baby feeding, then perhaps you should have a look at some of the National Geographic issues from the 1980’s and 1990’s when they were doing coverage of the suffering in Africa.

        As Jennifer said, it’s flesh. Flesh and muscle that happens to be formed in such a way that it holds milk. I’ll even go so far as to say that is it’s God-given purpose — even though I am not one whom believes in God. It’s number one function is to provide milk for children the mother bears. There is nothing that is written that a breast (or any other part of the body) *has* to be sexual. Hell, what is the number one thing a man does with his penis? He urinates. Sure, close second is to use it for adult activities, but adult activities is not *number one*!

        Any nay sayers need to get off their high horse, and go elsewhere when something offends them. Women have every right to breast feed whenever, wherever, and however they want.

      • Don’t tell me to put a blanket over my child when I’ve just come in from a 90 degree car ride with no A/C in my van! It is hard enough for me worrying if I am offending people that I sweat more and am dying of heat as is Yes I feel like a spectacle but don’t look for gosh sake, I doubt anyone has seen a mom saying Hey look at this! And then spraying a milk arch 3 feet in the air! (Moms don’t pee yourselves) seriously, “We don’t mind breastfeeding but do it so we are Not uncomfortable ” have a kid hang from your girls every two hrs and tell me how I should be the uncomfortable one???

      • Grace

        Have you ever read the book “For Women Only” ? There is a section in there that talks about how visual men are. We as women see it as no big deal, but I can promise you, they can see a woman’s breast and try to look away- but it’s like a magnet is drawing them back, no matter how much they may want to not do it… they also have another problem: They might recall that breast in every detail a year down the road with absolutely no warning. If you were a married woman, would you want to have your husband have to deal with this if he didn’t have to? I breast-fed both of my children- even in public. I used a cover, and if I wasn’t able to- I went outside to my car and did it there. I think that Jennifer is wrong that it is okay to do this-just whip out a boob. I don’t care how uncomfortable it is or if the baby doesn’t like the cover. Either you use one or you use the facilities (or in my case, my car).

      • Steph

        Grace, are you kidding me? When did you become the boob police? It is not the responsibility of the woman who is feeding her child to feel guilty about causing men to struggle. If a man sees a woman nursing and is sexually aroused, he has issues and needs counseling.
        “either you use it or you use the facilities?” people like you make me sick! It is completely legal, actually, in most states for women to walk around topless, nursing or not. So your asinine, random “rules” for other moms nursing? You can use them yourself, and then never suggest anything else to another nursing mom, ever. It is not your business, period. If a mom feels for comfortable covering, she should. She doesn’t want to? She has every right! Stop chastising mothers for feeding their children!

      • @grace, I agree whole heartedly with you. There is nothing wrong with a man who sees a boob, nursing or not, and it turns him on or he remembers it later. That is just the way they are hard wired. Just ask an honest man and he would tell you the truth. I see no problem with breast feeding as I breastfed my first, but have some respect and keep your ladies covered.

      • Moira

        Tabitha, you are a disgusting pervert if you equate a baby eating with something sexual. Your husband and all your “honest men” are too. You are no longer a porn star. You are a parent now. Get some counseling and move along into the grownup world, would you?

      • becca

        Really grace? You think women should cover up so peoples husbands Dont see, and remember every little detail about that breast a year later?!?! I honestly Dont care one bit if my hubby accidentally sees a lady breastfeeding. You must be very insecure in your marriage if you care so much that you want to force women and babies to be uncomfortable, just in case your husband happens to walk by and see. If you have that much of an issue with it, you should prob just not let him out… Dont let him TV or internet either. God forbid an ad with a half naked chick comes on that your husband will be think about for the next decade

    • Mark J. Geist

      Hear, hear!

    • Sanjoy Kumar Roy

      It took me a while to digest the sarcasm and all that while I was like wondering “What’s wrong in feeding the kid in public”. Then it dawned on me that there is something hidden in here. I scouted the responses and I sighed a relief.

      Yes, I don’t see any issue in feeding kids at public places but would definitely support the fact that the mother is well covered. I believe though the act is very loving and appreciable but should be done under covers not to make others uncomfortable.

      Three cheers to the mothers who CARE for their young ones while ensuring they is not making it a public affair.

      • E. Martin

        You honestly believe a mother should make another person’s comfort level a priority over her baby’s?
        “… but should be done under covers not to make others uncomfortable…” Wow, what a sad commentary on your own priorities!! My son’s needs will ALWAYS trump someone else’s “comfort level”!!! Many babies don’t like being covered to nurse…get over it!!! Look away!! Grow up!!

    • Deb Bean

      The whole point is that it needs to be normalized, so people can STOP being so darn ‘uncomfortable’ with something so beautiful (mother feeding baby) and natural. It should in NO way be associated with something sexual. Sure, there’s a boob involved. A breast which was created to nourish and feed a child – that is its whole purpose for existence. If other societies can have women breastfeed in public and have no problem with it (uncovered ‘n all), why can’t we? We need to get over ourselves and our sensitivities and see it for what it is.

      • Amen to E. Martins response, that is just right. Ya know tonight I saw the footage of chemical warfare and a baby gasping for life on BBC over in Damascus, I cried if only that child had the problem of all this disdain over God given nourishment than having to gasp for a breath over a terrorist act on the community. Is this society so self absorbed over arguing about breast feeding when mothers are loosing their babies in Damascus? Please think about that??

    • Sara

      And for those of us who have babies that don’t tolerate having blankets thrown over their heads? For those of us who have babies who thwart our plans of trying to be as discreet as possible by constantly lifting up shirts or knocking blankets aside? And what about on hot days? How would you like to eat with a blanket over your head? Trust me, I try to be as modest as possible, but it’s not always as easy as you seem to think it is. It’s just a boob doing what nature designed it to do. There is nothing sexually explicit about it. You see worse in society every single day. Get over it, madame.

      • Margo

        Thank you! I 110% agree with you I wish others whose are to insecure to feed openly on public should keep their comments to themselves! More power to those who just don’t care! ITS just BREASTFEEDING! For those who judge or want to make rude comments keep because the are comfortable with open feeding choices… Get over yourselves and grown up, if you can’t to that then mind your own and go away!

    • Faith

      You are what is wrong with society

    • Mel R

      Sorry, but you are mistaken. There in deed are people who are upset and disgusted by a breastfeeding baby. I was told on more than one occasion that I needed to do “that” in a restroom when my kids were babies. I even had to deal with “Do you have to do that here? I eat here at this table, that’s gross!” in a private home setting. My response to all of them was “Then you go eat in the restroom. If you can eat at the table then so can they! My breasts were designed to feed my children!”

    • Kara

      “NO ONE is upset, disgusted or mortified that someone is feeding their child. ”

      I suppose no one being upset is why when feeding my 8 month old, and he unexpectedly grabbed my shawl, yanked it off and tossed it, I was asked by the waitress (and a noisy lady at the table next to me) to finish feeding him in the bathroom. As if I wasn’t embarrassed enough.
      People do get offended at breastfeeding. It happens a lot, and it shouldn’t.

    • Kathryn

      Completely agree. No matter how you feel about “breasts not being sexual”, they have been sexualized by society and I for one don’t want to see them. I feel uncomfortable seeing boobs in public or really at all. I don’t watch porn, so why should I feel just as uncomfortable in a public place.

    • Jane

      Agreed, Courtney! Thank you! (Proud breastfeeder of 2 boys, here.)

      • Jane

        I should say, I nursed everywhere and anywhere and never ONCE did my boobs just get whipped out for everyone to see. My first, I used a cover, my second wouldn’t hear of it. I got creative with clothing covering things and was super proficient at latching on and getting things done. No one saw or needed to see (from my point of view) my breasts. I never was asked to leave anywhere, go to a bathroom or to stop feeding my babies. I don’t *think* everything needs to be bared to breastfeed, just my opinion. And, I’d say like 95% of moms I see, one wouldn’t even know what’s going on, but I’ve seen the 5% that even I, who am comfortable with nursing babies, was like “oh, hello!”.

    • kerry

      I breastfed my daughter, and I tried my best not to have to do it in public, but that was my own choice. I would even leave the living room in my own house when my in-laws or my father was over. However, I hate reading about women being publicly shamed for their choice or need to bf in public. My hope is that the more acceptance women who bf have, the more common it will become. The more we see it the less uncomftorable our reactions to it will be. I am having my second baby in March, and I’m sure I will be out in public much more this time around- taking my toddler places. Hopefully I won’t offend anyone, but frankly my baby is my top priority.

  6. I don’t know, but the way some women work that applesauce jar just makes me lose my mind!

    In all seriousness, great post! I’ve seen many attempts to satire this issue, and I feel yours was quite successful. The analogy you chose is perfect, particularly because, as with anything, eating can be done inappropriately as well. It helps people to articulate better the essence of inappropriate behavior and then apply that standard to breastfeeding. In other words, just eat to get the job done. Don’t make a scene of it or do it in a manner that would reasonably draw attention to yourself (such as slurping loudly or throwing your food at other people). If someone happens to see you in their field of vision or chooses to look over when they hear you sitting down initially, that doesn’t count as a distraction. Take enough time to swallow and enjoy your food and relax if you so desire, as mealtime is meant to be a pleasant experience.

    And last but not least, don’t feel guilty if someone sees that sexy spoon of yours and can’t control their own hormones. It’s not like you waved it in their face…oh, and don’t do that either. 🙂

  7. Brilliant!! Thanks for sharing.

  8. omg I love this!!!! thank you for being so awesome.

  9. Faith Stucke

    You are truly and idiot! Who are you to say when and where someone should feed their child. When I am out and my son needs eat I will feed him as so. If you did not like what you saw you should have gotten up and left. Had I been the person who you approached with this you would have not been happy with my response. As a mother of an 11 month old boy I will not be told to stay in my house because my child needs to eat when he is hungry. You need to worry about yourself and what goes on in ur life not about other people. This post did nothing but make me laugh and realize how stupid some people can be. Worry about you!!!

    • It was sarcastic. I am advocating BFing in public. My word.

    • Oh Faith, honey. Don’t call people idiots. >.>

    • Jess

      Oh my life, Faith. How stupid are you? It is called ‘humour’. Get some.

    • Sarah Hemming

      ….. you’re a moron.

    • cassie

      You are so clueless that I kind of feel bad for you, this must be really embarassing.

      “Who are you to say when and where someone should feed their child.”

      Ok… reread this article. Read it slowly, read it carefully. Throw in a strong tone of sarcasm, and say it again.


      That was the entire point made by this article.

    • Kye

      For the love of God please tell me you are joking. CLEARLY the author was making a very clear comparison between the reactions that mothers get who breast feed in public to what it would be like if the shoe were on the other foot. The point is, can you imagine if we treated mothers who choose to bottle feed (or in this case spoon feed) their baby the way we do to mothers who BF? Can you imagine feeding your 11 month old son and somebody came up to you and asked you to feed him in a dirty bathroom or throw a towel over his head so they didn’t have to watch? While I get the point others are trying to make about breasts being out being simply uncomfortable, and not actually a matter of the act of breastfeeding that makes it so uncomfortable..Just look away! I am made uncomfortable DAILY by the amount of skin and cleavage showing on 13 year old girls walking around in the streets or at the mall..Hell even the amount of skin adults choose to show, but that doesn’t give me the right to walk up to them and criticize the way they choose to dress themselves and demand they cover up or go home and do their shopping online so I dont have to look at their mostly exposed bodies..It means that I have to LOOK AWAY and continue on with my day. Its that simple people. You control yourselves, thats it. Let people be and stop trying to tell others how to live their lives when you struggle in your own life with your own choices and decisions and battles daily.

      • YES!!!! Enough said right there KYE it is about self governance exactly right! It is natural, I don’t think anyone should use this as a platform to go streakin but yes get off the back of us moms are milk filled boobs are heavy enough!!!! And yes this is sarcasm and humor! Kye I love you!!!!

    • becca

      I’m pretty sure faith was not talking about the article… She even says it made her laugh. I think she meant to reply to someone else

  10. TrIstevietops


  11. Lucy

    Courtney, I see your point but the fact is, women’s breasts are exposed all over the place. On billboards, on magazine covers in the grocery store, on TV. Most women show less than that when feeding their babies, yet people act shocked. The problem is not how much shows, the problem is that breasts are thought of as only sexual in our culture. They aren’t ONLY sexual. They are also made for feeding babies. In other cultures, nobody thinks anything of a woman’s breasts being exposed to feed a baby because that is what they are for, they don’t think she is doing something sexual. I think it has to take women brave enough to not worry about exactly how much is exposed to maybe shock a few people until we start to think of it as a normal and natural way to feed a baby. I’m not suggesting women deliberately expose as much as possible of their breasts, just that they shouldn’t have to be too concerned about exactly how much is showing.

  12. Society needs to get over its fear of naked bodies, especially breast feeding breasts. No one is hurt by seeing the body of another. It is an irrational reaction, and using it to justify mistreating breastfeeding women and babies is flawed. They are hurting no-one. Regardless of discretion.

  13. Anna

    Lol! This post is a funny way to put it. I’ll be honest, I’m not a mom, nor have desire to be one. However, I know plenty of people who are (two of my sisters and plenty of friends) many of whom have breastfed. My 2nd sister in particular was skittish about bfing in public. I think somebody said something to her or she heard too many stories of people who were treated badly for it. My friend from childhood said that somebody said something nasty to her when she was bfing in church. She sat on the last pew listening to the sermon when someone made their comment. She didn’t cover, but that is because her son (who was later dx’ed special needs) he wouldn’t let her (more than likely a sensory issue). I think it’s ridiculous that our society has grown so censored of the natural human body that breasts are only regarded in a sexual sense. This idea that human bodies are only meant to be regarded in a sexual sense permeates our society in many ways, influencing our self-confidence (or the lack of) and body image. Which of course, has affected me in another way, as I myself have recovered from anorexia. Personally I am not offended at all at people breastfeeding in public. In fact, I am happy to report, that I went to the biggest local art museum in my area (The Nelson Atkins museum of art here in Kansas City), and my boyfriend and I went through the feature exhibit (this particular one being the frieda kahlo/diego riviera & modern mexico exhibit) on a very busy day (busy as in, people bumping into each other shoulder to shoulder busy). Near the end of the exhibit, a woman was sitting on the bench breastfeeding her kid. I am happy to report not one person i saw there (and there was a wide slew of different people there) ever complained to her or gave her grief about it. At least, not that i saw. I turned to her, she gave me a look like she thought I was going to say something to her about it. Instead, we chuckled about the art in front of us– the surveilance video of a fox trotting through another art museum that an artist had decided to put on display and various attributes of animal psychology this fox showed.

  14. Sherri L. Hargrove-Johns

    Love the satirical slant on the feeding in public. The only way we as educators, consultants, advocates, and supporters of breastfeeding and mothers and babies right to breastfeed in public is if we keep it in the public eye. Sad that many people are prudish but that is the fault of society at large. The breast has been taken from its natural intent to feed and become taboo and strictly for sexual gratification. Women walking about in the streets showing their breasts are hardly flinched at and mothers feeding their babies are villified? We really are a twisted society. Believe me, its not like women are whipping out their breasts for all the world to see. You’d actually have to walk up on a woman and literally be in her comfort space to see what she is actually doing. I saw one woman in a grocery store with her babe strapped to her nursing and the male friend that was with me pleasantly surprised me by saying that he saw nothing wrong with it, that it was natural, and his final thought that it was cool. Quite refreshing. I have never seen a woman in public with her entire blouse removed to feed a baby. You can barely see the nipple when breastfeeding in public so I don’t see what all the brouhaha is about. We as a society need to really get our act together and be outraged at other things that are truly detrimental to public health and well being and take the negative focus off breastfeeding and appreciate it for the superlative benefits that it provides to mother, child, and family and the community and in the interest of health and well being.

  15. Deb

    I remember reading stories about whole communities in eariler times living in one shelter. Families sleeping side by side. If a couple does what comes naturally their privacy was respected, the other members of the community looked away. I live very close to my suburban neighbors. I can sometimes see and hear the sounds and sights of life within their home. I close my window. I look the other way. I respect their privacy. In this day and age when nothing is private, we forget that we do have have control. We are not compelled to stop and stare. If it is not a crime or abuse being committed and If you are uncomfortable, turn your head and go about your own business. Respect another human being’s privacy. Duh.

  16. I bet you and Society $1mil (virtual dollars cause nobody would pay me this), the only person who would notice a nursing mother is the person who is uncomfortable seeing the breast utilized as something other than a sexual object. Oh My GOD!!!! Which is it? An object to feed a small child or an object to be fondled in the confines of a consentual relationship. I don’t know, my head is spinning. I can’t decide. Oh wait, I was told they are to be hidden unless touched by a man in a sexual manner. What she is doing is wrong. I must report this to the world that she is wrong. This mother must pointed out and embarrassed like I feel. ugh. I had one old guy sit down beside me, look over, see me nursing my fully covered child and self and jump up like I had the plague.

    As for children being offended. Ahahahahaha. They are curious. They ask why a baby is doing something. the same way they will say. “Mom, that lady’s black.” Yep, I said that to my own mother when I was little, so I must have been a racist. No, I was just noticing that people didn’t look the same as me and I was making an observation. My mom was embarrassed, and she could have told me to shush, or did what she did and say, “Yes, she is. And you are white. People are different colours.” And left it at that. My 15yr old was a tad embarrassed because I’m his mom and he’s seeing my boob. Even if it was just a little. Also because he had never seen a nursing mother. My 7, 4 and 2 yr old think this is normal. They will say, hey that baby is eating and go on their way. But will ask why a baby is drinking from a bottle because they didn’t. I tell them that is another way for babies to eat. Simple. People need to simmer down and let kids eat.

    Besides I’d rather a sane mom for getting out not staying inside developing post partum depression or psychosis because they are stuck inside with a baby nursing every two hours. Or a screaming baby because they are hungry and the mom is fearful of persecution because she doesn’t want to nurse at home, in an uncomfortable car or a public washroom. And don’t tell me there are nursing rooms. Any nursing mother will tell you those rooms are washrooms with a small class playpen enclosures attached to sit and nurse. It’s still a washroom. When I see society eating their meals in washrooms everytime they need to eat, that is when I will tell a nursing mother to.

    ok, vent done.

    I LOVED THIS POST! Well written!

  17. Yeni Lozano

    I wouldn’t mind living in a nudist colony. That being said, I could give two shits if I see your private parts or not. Breastfeed away!

  18. jennjennbows@gmail.com

    really a fit over spoon feeding a baby? lmfao the world these days ….. smh

    • cassie

      How is it possible that people as clueless as you really exist!? PLEASE tell me that your hair is not bleached blonde…. I really get so tired of all the blonde jokes because of people like you that think being fake blonde will excuse such stupid comments -_-

      I’ll help you out and clue you in 😉


      (seriously, if you’re not a natural blonde, please never aspire to be one… we don’t need any more fuel on this fire)

  19. I loved it! Gave me a chuckle. I always think this when I see people say to cover up. Let’s all just cover up our kids while they try to eat. That sounds like the only fair thing to do.

  20. Kye

    It amazes me how so many people can witness abuse or something just not right and look the other way, not saying a word, justifying it to themselves by saying “Well it just really isn’t my business”; but you see a mother using her body to feed and nourish her baby in public and oh my gosh you are so undignified you can’t slow your roll enough to just look away and carry on, you just HAVE to give a nasty look or make a rude comment. Just terrible.

  21. Two very enthusiastic thumbs up! Great post!

  22. Veryyes

    This. Is. AWESOME!!!
    – A breast feeding supporting husband and father.

  23. I see a lot of comments talking about how we see breasts all over in advertising. That we don’t balk at that, but we do at bfing. They grumble that those who are complaining about public breast feeding are perverts, or seeing it as a sexual thing. What if, perhaps, the problem is that we as a culture have been sold breasts=sex=retail for so long that it has brainwashed our society (or at least a large portion) into seeing breasts only as sexual objects? They can’t even fathom that they have a utilitarian purpose, except to sell clothing, pop, gum, toothpaste, you-name-it. Maybe, if the marketing industry would “simmer down” we moms could breastfeed our wee ones without dirty looks, confrontations, or snide remarks. Maybe we wouldn’t have to feel ashamed that we can use our bodies the way they were made. We wouldn’t feel like we have to be embarrassed for functioning properly. I doubt my ranting will convince the marketeers, because we all know: “sex sells” and “money talks.”

  24. I Breastfeed a Toddler so Suck on THAT

    The debate on this issue never ceases to amuse me. I love the initial post and the comments are like icing on the cake!

  25. Ari Mignogna

    I love the “just cover up” comments because it’s pretty darn obvious that you’ve never breastfed past the first few weeks. I am a mom who makes and SELLS nursing covers. I have tried everything and my baby just won’t eat under one. Most of the day we are home, but if I do happen to take the kids out to the mall and DBug needs to eat, there’s no option for covering up! I make more of a scene trying to put the cover on, then have him screaming on my nipple, wiggling and batting at the cover, and now that everyone is staring I’ve got to take it off and actually feed the poor guy. NO THANKS. Some moms love the covers, but some babies will just not allow for it.

  26. pris

    THIS CHICK IS THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!! ty for telling those ignorant fools…LOL… couldn’t stop laughing.

  27. ingrid meli

    It is much fuss done by the women themselves than because of the husband or children. In my opinion as long as she is nursing discreetly and in an appropriate matter : 1) the majority of man don’t stare at the nursing mother like a woman herself. 2) I never heard a man complain about a nursing mother in public – it’s always the woman herself who complains with an excuse of children and the husband.

  28. Sascha

    Thank you, this Really made me Giggle lots!!

  29. I don’t understand why people have a problem with mothers breast feeding. Cover up! Really? Do they make men cover up when they are walking around shirtless with their boobs showing? No! Feed the baby in the bathroom? Do you want to take your meals to the bathroom and eat? No! Come on people…it’s a natural thing to do. Breast feeding is the best for the baby. Do you not eat when you get hungry? Why can’t a baby? Just because a mother is breast feeding does not mean you have to stare at her breast!!! She has a face to look at. I would rather see a mother breast feeding then I would see the crack of someones butt, women wearing tops cut clear to their belly button and people wearing their pants hanging clear to their knees and their boxers hanging out. I see this in public all the time. Do we ask them to dress differently? NO!

    Leave those mother’s alone to nourish their babies.

    Go pick on someone who deserves it.

  30. none of your god dam business

    Your a dumb stuck up ignorant bitch. Grow the fuck up, if u lived in a third world country , that’s you u would see when babies are getting feed. Shame on you for judging what is only natural. You don’t like it then stop starring at it. What would happen if there wasn’t a location that would suit you’re standards? what is a mother to do? Starve their child because it makes u uncomfortable and deny healthy biological and psychological attachment between a mother and their child. ? Well?

    • This article is sarcastic. I am a huge breastfeeding advocate. I’m on your side on this issue. But in the future, please know that nasty language is a filler for when you are not articulate enough to say something meaningful and planned out. I have nursed all seven of my children in public. It’s a joke. Most people got that. I m amazed by the ones that didn’t, who I had to defend myself against because they lack a sense of humor. Please never refer to me as a “bitch” again. I don’t care for it. Thank you.

      • Crystal Sparks

        ^Get her girl!! It’s entertaining, to say the least…and coincidental that the people who are calling you out for being ignorant-tend to be the ones who speak(and type) with great ignorance!! Lol!! I absolutely agree with you and the “dirty mouths”…it speaks volumes to their (lack of) education! LOVED your post, what a great and creative way to get the point across!! I will be sharing!

      • BowtiesAreCool

        Well put, Anna.

  31. Brittney

    This article does not make sense to me. At all…what was the point of it being written? I read it twice and still can’t figure it out. And what does it have to do with breastfeeding children?

    • It’s a sattire piece comparing a baby being spoon fed to being breastfed. People freak out when they see a mom breastfeeding. It’s basically saying, “This is how it looks when someone freaks out about a mom breastfeeding. It’s DUMB.”

    • Hannah

      It’s about other’s irrational objections to breastfeeding in public. It’s a tongue in cheek expression of how ridiculous people can be about how, where, and when a mother feeds her child.

    • BowtiesAreCool

      Brittney… Replace the applesauce reference with breastfeeding and reread it. She was using sarcasm and humor to explain how ridiculous it is that people have an issue with a mother feeding her infant in public.

    • Jess

      If you had to read it twice, I can only offer my sincere condolences for your idiocy. And assume that you were deprived of breast milk.

  32. Sonya Lawson

    Umm. I’m all about breast feeding and I did my children. But I don’t want to see the woman’s breast while she’s doing it. You can’t compare a spoon to a boob!! Come on! A spoon is not a private body part. And yes it is a private body part! And we all teach out kids that! Would you want some man eyeing your 13 year olds breasts cause they were hanging out? It doesn’t change just because you’re feeding your baby! I’m soo glad you chose to breast feed and you should be allowed to do it in public but cover up!!

    • Margo

      I’m sorry but not all infants who are breastfeed enjoy being covered up, like my 3 child she hated it. You do not see the mothers nipple you see cleavage. Breastfeeding is a beautiful thing and woman should not feel ashamed to breastfeed covered or not. Their is a reason we have boobs… When my 3 was hungry I feed her when needed without shame, but I refused to feed in dirtyass bathrooms where germs run ramped. A woman should be able feed in public covered or not without judgement. If you are uncomfortable or don’t agree with her choice keep it to yourself or go away.

    • Margo

      Your ignorant. She isn’t flashing her nipple around showing it off to others. Woman have the choice to cover or not cover get over it, we were given breast to feed our infants whenever and wherever when they need it. If your uncomfortable get over it or go away.

    • Jess

      How foolish? If breasts weren’t constantly flaunted as sexual objects, and instead recognised for their purpose, to nourish our children, then perhaps it wouldn’t be such an issue for you? Don’t get me wrong, I love a revealing top as much as the next 20 something female, but when it came to feeding my baby in public I couldn’t have given a hoot whether someone caught a glimpse of the much mystified nipple/areola for what might have been 2-5 seconds while I attached my son. It’s the people who find it inappropriate who have the issues. If everybody just accepted it’s the biological norm, then you wouldn’t have to get your knickers (oooo I hope you’re ok with me saying knickers!!?) in a twist over a satirical and cleverly written article which is taking the proverbial out if prudes like yourself.

  33. Hannah

    I think that BF moms should start a revolution and make a point to feed their babes in front of establishments that sell sensual clothing. Then redirect rude comments and ignorant glares to the models posting behind them. “If they can do it, why can’t I?” When my daughter was about 3, we were passing by a Victoria’s Secret, and since she was so used to the idea of BF, said, “Wow! Look at all that milk!” That’s right baby… that’s what they’re for!

  34. Hahaha I love this! I always breastfeed in public (with a blanket) and some people where fine with it and others where rude. However, no one like a screaming baby, so I happily feed them.

  35. Kirstin

    BRILLIANT. This is totally fabulous work of art. It was hilarious and so well worded. Bravo!!! Thank you for the chuckle while making a wonderful point.


  36. Judy

    1) The original article is a parody. If you don’t get it, you’re not stupid, it’s OK, just move on.

    2) I’m about as pro-breastfeeding as they come. It’s the best way for babies and for mothers, has been since the beginning of time, and modest public breastfeeding should be permitted anywhere, anytime.

    3) I do believe in modest breastfeeding. You can believe anything you want about modesty, and you can do anything you want in private, but in public we all have to compromise to protect everyone’s rights. I have the right to choose whether or not my children will see adults naked, (even if others may have different standards for their children) and my husband has the right to not have to see a woman besides his wife naked (even if that doesn’t bother others). The article is humorous, but breasts aren’t spoons. 🙂

    Yes, the human body is beautiful…but I believe in monogamous marriage, and I believe that that beauty is meant for one’s spouse only .

    Yes, breastfeeding has been done immodestly in the past…but that doesn’t mean that our culture must.

    Yes, women dress incredibly immodestly, and the fairness of that is topic for another discussion…but their impropriety doesn’t have to dictate the actions of others. In many places, exposing a breast would be considered public nudity and could be illegal.

    Yes, it sometimes takes a bit of effort to breastfeed modestly; I know because I nursed three children, one a very hyperactive boy, but it really wasn’t hard at all. If at times you have to go elsewhere to nurse (though I never had to)…well, that’s inconvenient, but lots of things are inconvenient when you have children! If your child were pitching a fit/screaming, throwing up, or any of the other random things that children tend to do that are very distracting, that you’d have to go elsewhere for that also. I nursed three for at least 1-1/2 years each anywhere and everywhere…modestly, and never had anything but positive reactions.

    Yes, breastfeeding is natural and normal and healthy….and they make some trendy coverups for it now. 😉

    Unfortunately I know that some will be offended by my opinion, and I regret that but I don’t apologize for it; I want to speak up for those who value modesty. There are some over-the-top rude and vulgar comments here; I am trying to be gentle, I don’t condone rudeness to a woman who is nursing in public, but I have the right to an equal voice in this discussion. .

    And lest you think it’s just me…my husband would not only agree with me, his answer would be WAAAY less tactful than mine.

    • Awesome and valid argument. I love hearing the many opinions on this topic when they are articulated in such a well-thought-out way. It’s the rudeness that I don’t care for. Thanks for the interesting comment, Judy!

  37. momof5

    Thanks for making me laugh this morning! I’ve nursed all of my 5 in public and yes, in bathrooms too. Sorry for the negative comments. Keep up the good work!

  38. For those of you that say you have to be discreet, cover up, etc etc. Dude. It doesn’t always work that way! With my first child we discovered I had inverted nipples… AFTER she was born. I could not nurse without a breast shield. Go for it. Be a new mom after a c-section and hold your mandatory pillow (to keep baby off your painful incision), a breast shield, a screaming baby… and keep your clothes straight and a cover on. You have a problem with me, cover your own face. Or, go into a bathroom where you don’t have to see such things.

  39. Cattie

    Yeah….I couldn’t nurse my daughter as much as I wanted to. But I -dare- anyone to say word one to any nursing mother while I’m in earshot. (Pack Aunt mode: engage). I have exactly no issue making them really, really regret opening their mouths.

    Boobs are for babies. Maybe if your astoundingly puritanical ancestors hadn’t for some reason decided that they were only to be funbags for men, this wouldn’t be an issue, and babies wouldn’t have to come second place to your comfort.


  40. My husband and I went to dinner Sunday after church. While there across from us was a young mother with a blanket over her and under that blanket was a beautiful dark haired baby girl. I was going to go up to her and tell her how proud I was she as breastfeeding her baby in public, when she opened the blanket and pulled a bottle out of the baby’s mouth. I was so disappointed I just turned my head and finished eating.

  41. Judy

    Please never be disappointed when you see a baby being lovingly cared for; you don’t necessarily know the circumstances. I can say from experience that some babies *love* to be under their nursing covers, are more relaxed & comfortable and less distracted there, so even when fed a bottle or just cuddled it’s the best place for them, especially in public where they might otherwise be fussy, or when someone else is feeding them. I used to do that for my friend’s baby; I think the cover smelled like her. 🙂 As far as the bottle, it might be pumped breast milk fed by the mom or someone else like a babysitter or relative…dil pumps sometimes to keep things even :), people have to pump ahead if they are going to take meds for surgery or whatever, Could be a formula bottle for a fostered/adopted baby.

  42. Pingback: Indecent Exposure: Breastfeeding and Porn. Reflections. - Mermaid's Purse

  43. Shanna Martin

    OMG. I love you.

  44. Margo

    First off, you have no right to judge this woman. I highly doubt she was “seducing” or making inappropriate sexually explicit gestures while feeding her child, and shame on you for judging her parenting style. Woman have the right to breastfeed wherever when their child is hungry. If you don’t like it leave, or mind your own business! As a mother of 3, I breastfeed my child when they were hungry wherever. So how dare you judge this woman just because you don’t agree with how she feeds her child… Did you ever Think that just maybe that maybe how he will take introduction to jar food??? Or we’re you simply to consumed by how it doesn’t suit you? Shame shame shame on you for judging this mother. It’s people like you that make woman uncomfortable to breastfeed their children in public, when it’s non of your business. Simple get over yourself, focus on your own life and quit judging others simply because you don’t agree with her tactics!

    • Margo, this is satirical about the debate on public breast feeding, my dear. Which I have done. With all 7 of my children. Go back and read it again with this understanding, and maybe you’ll find it funny like a bunch of other breastfeeding ladies did. =)

    • Jess

      Good lord. I can’t process how some people don’t understand the sarcasm and satire of this awesome article?! It’s hilarious. I read it once. Jeeesh!!

  45. My biggest issue with breastfeeding in public is I am judged either way. I get dirty looks when covered up and when uncovered. I don’t see why I should feel ashamed of myself for doing right by my child. I already get plenty of criticism for having two children before 20. My 22 month old is so smart and healthy and I just want that for my 2 month old also. I feel so close to my baby when he feeds, when they stop feeding they become less attached :/ I was so sad.

  46. JessL

    I don’t understand how anyone could be offended by a baby being nursed by it’s mother. It’s just such a foreign concept to me. If there are people who think there is something sexual about a little side boob or a nip slip while this is happening, you are the problem, not the mother and her hungry child. We are mammals, that’s how our young are meant to be fed. If we were birds we’d have to puke food into our babies’ mouths. Imagine that one for a second.
    Hilarious article, thanks for the laugh this morning.

  47. Lynn Attebery

    I just have to throw in for those of you that think its gross or uncomfortable for men to see a woman breastfeeding that there is a group (i cant remember where) of men that actually breast feed the children in the tribe ill attempt to figure it out and attach a link. Btw for those of you that think its wrong and gross to feed in public it was my fear of you people that caused me to dry up and go into a depression after only being able to last about 6 months. I was heart broken and we are a busy family. But due to my already massive insecurity of how i looked being as i gained a ton of weight on top of being afraid of you people i would have an anxiety attack just thinking about feeding. So thank you. Fyi id still be doing it if i could and my baby is 3

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